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Emmie Friday Five Lyfe Parenting

Hoping for Growth Spurts (11 Weeks, Friday Catch Up 4/13)

This week, I was literally hoping that Emmie was going through a growth spurt, what with how she was acting! Find out why in the Friday Catch Up!

Find out how my birthday weekend was on the Weekend Catch Up from Monday!

Friday Catch Up 4/13 (happy Friday 13th!)

1) Birthday Update:

First of all, thank you so much to everyone that wished me a happy birthday or even thought about me that day. 30 is a big birthday, but one that I was ready for. I explained on Monday that I actually feel my age for once, and so it was nice to finally be there. Also, when/if I try to qualify for Boston again, new age group!

My birthday was… interesting. Emmie was a bit of a hot mess and it snowed. But whatever, I had such a great weekend that I didn’t care! After all of the fun and presents of the weekend, I had only 2 material wishes for my birthday: a ridiculous drink from Starbucks and a vegan donut from Stan’s.

I got my ridiculous drink, and I was so embarassed with my order that I did it as a mobile order so that I a) didn’t have to say it (mostly because I knew that I would forget parts of it) and b) they would just say “Susie Mobile Order.” Definitely my most high maintenance order yet (and this from someone who loves Decaf Coffee Frappuccino Lights). I got a Decaf Almond Milk Cappuccino with Sugar Free Cinnamon Dolce Syrup and Light Cinnamon Dolce topping. If I had to do it over again, I would get a latte, but whatever. I enjoyed it at Starbucks (Emmie was asleep in Rob the Bob) before heading to the grocery store.

Alex capped off my treats with my one big big request: a vegan donut from Stan’s Donuts. Turns out they have 2 kinds: original and cinnamon sugar. Verdict? Very similar to a crumb/cake donut, but denser. I prefered the original. We cut them both in half and devoured our halves! Alex also gave me some great cards (one funny, one sweet) and then I got a great present of the baby going down fairly easily and sleeping well. The only night this week she really did!

2) Birth Control Update:

I’ve stopped taking the pill. Last week, I could tell that my milk supply was already suffering after 48 hours, and it felt like Emmie was literally draining me by mid morning. We knew that this was a possibility, but I didn’t think it would be THAT bad. Plus the 4 nights straight of horrific night sweats. But the big thing was the fact that I am trying to exclusively breastfeed and Emmie just couldn’t get enough. 

I can’t tell her no

So I stopped, and my milk supply rebounded within 48 hours, but I could tell a difference within 36 hours. And good think that I did stop it, because Emmie has been feeding nonstop this week. 

3) Emmie Update:

We are all over the place, but one thing that is consistent is that she has become a Stage 5 Clinger, Hungry Hungry Hippo, and a Cat Napper. I am hoping we are working on a growth spurt. But we might just be Emmie-ing. At this point, it doesn’t upset me or make me feel like I am doing a bad job–I know that I am doing a great job, she is just a baby. The one most frustrating bit is the fact that she isn’t sleeping well AT ALL. We’ve had one good night of sleep this week, and otherwise…. no.

She is loathe to sleep longer than 10 min during the day. She won’t stop falling asleep while nursing, then cat napping for 5ish minutes, then awake and DEMANDING to be fed. You transfer her to her bassinet or rocker? AWAKE and not having it. Try and just hold her? You might get lucky with her sleeping there, but most likely she’ll be awake before long. And then she will randomly take a 3 hour nap (this happened while I was on epic unplanned errand adventure). He easy nighttime feeds are difficult with the whole falling-asleep-at-the-boob thing. 

But we have also had some great moments this week. She flipped herself over twice in tummy time (a total fluke) one morning (maybe on my birthday?), bath on the counter (no tears!), we have been playing with her new activity gym, she wore maybe my favorite outfit of hers ever, and she saw herself in the mirror in the hallway of our apartment building and thought she was SOOOOO cute (she is). So we are having fun in the midst of the chaos 😀

Hey, it is the Lemmer Zoo, right?

4) I started to have a panic attack this week. It was over something seemingly trivial, but important to me because I had promised something to someone else and didn’t think I would be able to fulfill my responsibilities. I was embarrassed and frustrated and disappointment in myself. And wearing the kiddo when I realized that I wouldn’t be able to do what I was trying to do. I tried to keep calm, I took the dog and kid for a walk instead, then came back to try again, and it got worse. I called Alex, but he was in the middle of meetings. I called Mom, but she is in Mexico. 

I had to tell myself that I would figure out a solution, but I needed to remember that I have much more important things in my life (like my kid), and I needed to think through my options. 

Anxiety attacks are the worst.

I ultimately came up with a solution, everything got dealt with, but it was a reminder to us all that even though I am doing really well and even am on a lower dose of my Effexor, these are still possibilities. THAT SAID, I was also really proud of myself for having perspective in the moment and knowing that I was catastrophizing and focusing on the fact that this was not life/death, that Emmie was most important to me, and that I could deal with the situation. 

Major learning moment.

(Yes, I live with Anxiety and Depression)

5) I have a new goal when it comes to this blog (for which I just renewed the domain for another year). And that is to get back to something that used to be just a given: responding to all of the amazing and wonderful comments that you leave me. I am honestly embarrassed at how I’ve let what used to be a tenet of my blog–answering all of your thoughtful comments with thoughtful response–slip. I think part of it is the fact that I really DO give thoughtful responses–I don’t just say 3 words and move on, for the most part.

But I’ve gotten out of the habit, much like I have with exercise. I see your comments, but I don’t always respond. I make up excuses (Emmie takes two hands, I’m too tired, whatever), but there is no excuse. If you take the time, I can take the time. I am so fortunate to have amazing people around me; I need to show you the respect you deserve! 

Don’t disappoint her.

So please forgive me, and expect to get a lot of reply notifications!

This weekend, Alex has a few nights of call (yay not), I have a few fitness classes (Hot Yoga and Tone and Flow), and I feel like there is something else hidden in there. I have no idea what that might be.

Have a great weekend, everyone! I hope you sleep better than I am going to!

What is a habit/ritual/routine that used to be a given in your life that you have let slip?

Do you have an embarrassing Starbucks order? I once tried to order the cheapo Frappuccino, which is a blended iced americano, or something like that. It was useless.

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  • Reply Carla

    So much yes to number four. And I think I was really lucky because I spent ages six months to a year in Guatemala. It felt really really hard at the time but – – and I knew I would see this later in life even in the moment – – I really didn’t have any demands except for motherhood. XOXO

    April 13, 2018 at 5:23 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      And you are AMAZING at it!

      April 13, 2018 at 9:08 am
  • Reply jennifer

    She is so adorable! This is my favorite baby age, big enough for smiles and flipping over . . . but not mobile yet! BTW, thanks for the high-maintenance coffee order idea . . I had no idea about the light cinnamon dolce topping

    April 13, 2018 at 6:44 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      I didn’t either–i saw it in the app!

      April 13, 2018 at 9:08 am
  • Reply Sara Larsen

    Logan naps really well when running errands too! I’m sorry about the anxiety, I understand it well, but it’s great you realized taking care of your baby is the most important thing. I remind myself of that often.

    April 13, 2018 at 7:49 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      I’m kind of glad that I was wearing her right then. It made me snap out of it.

      April 13, 2018 at 9:07 am
  • Reply Maureen

    I always feel so awkward when I have a high maintenance order regardless of where it is. I wish every place had mobile order so I don’t have to say it out loud haha.

    Fingers crossed Emmie sleep better this weekend for you!

    April 13, 2018 at 8:09 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      Omg that app would be amazing. We need to get on that!

      April 13, 2018 at 9:07 am
  • Reply Jess

    But first: when you have a baby allllll kinds of things slip. Grace for the moment. This has been my theme so far this year. Second, breast-feeding is hard as crap! It’s a full-time job. Especially when they learn how to start twisting their head on your nipple! Anyway, anxiety and depression can be exasperated during the newborn months. I’ve been struggling with some and the feelings of letting people down. I’ve been trying to maintain my business but it’s proving almost impossible with the baby at home. So we’re looking into a sitter. But then again is it worth it? Will they love her, read to her, give her tummy time when she needs it, keep her on the feeding and napping schedule, will I be happier working? I don’t know. But, I do know I need to get out of the house more. And yes, my orders are always complicated ha ha

    April 13, 2018 at 9:31 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      I’m the right sitter will be like an older sibling (one who is 100% dedicated to the job). I had a family that I sat for during high school and thought of those kids as my little bros. And I’m still in touch with some of the sitters from my youth! You just need to find the right one.
      God speed to all of us!

      April 13, 2018 at 2:34 pm
  • Reply Julie Running in a Skirt

    She is so adorable! I’m sorry the sleeping isn’t going well for you– I’m sure that doesn’t help the anxiety at all!
    I’ve let responding to all the comments slip sometimestoo. I read them and love them though.

    April 13, 2018 at 9:39 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      Me too. I love reading them, so why am I not responding to them? Is it kind of like not wanting to talk on the phone?

      April 13, 2018 at 2:32 pm
  • Reply Eric

    Happy Belated Birthday Coach! I was on vacation and ignored the outside world for a good weekend, then my life got crazy with the CT-Brooklyn Commute.

    BQ times are 19-34… so no new time qualification standard 🙁 . I was excited when I hit 30 last year because up until then in all other races it was a 29 year old in the same category as 18 year olds, which really messes with your rankings (not that I’m competitive or even fast but I just thought it was messed up 29 is grouped with 18).

    April 13, 2018 at 9:50 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      I should probably know that by now. Must have been wishful thinking!

      April 13, 2018 at 2:32 pm
  • Reply Nicci Randall

    Hehehe I love that you got exactly what you wanted on your b-day. Sending you some very belated wishes! Emmie is looking as adorable as ever and you are killing it mama! Just had a friend move to Chicago so we will be there at some point in the future and would love to grab a coffee, high-maintenance order or not 😉 XOXO!!

    April 13, 2018 at 11:08 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      Omg that would MAKE MY LIFEEEEEEE. How about we get a non high maintenance coffee at a high maintenance place?

      April 13, 2018 at 2:31 pm
      • Reply Nicci Randall

        Hehehe, I like your style! Let’s do it!!

        April 13, 2018 at 3:44 pm
  • Reply Hannah

    I’m much too indecisive to have a high maintenance order – the standard menu options are already too many to choose from. I hope everyone can get some more sleep soon!

    April 13, 2018 at 12:10 pm
    • Reply suzlyfe

      It took me a while to figure out what I wanted, I won’t lie!

      April 13, 2018 at 2:30 pm
  • Reply Jamie

    I love you. You can take a break from responsibing yo me for two years until you get both hands back

    April 13, 2018 at 6:45 pm
    • Reply suzlyfe

      I need a phone or computer that I can legit dictate to. My speech to text program nlows.

      April 14, 2018 at 3:47 am
  • Reply The Curious Frugal

    I think your readers totally understand about not responding as often to comments. You just had a baby and that’s a big deal! You take care of Emmie and you first, whatever that looks like. My embarrassing Starbucks order? Sometimes I find their drinks too hot and if I want to drink it right away I’ll ask for it a bit cooler. They’ll inevitably belt out “kids temperature!” Which for some reason makes me feel less than a grown up. Lol

    April 13, 2018 at 9:18 pm
    • Reply suzlyfe

      Ooo that is a bit below the belt! And I think it gives you license to get really ridiculous!

      April 14, 2018 at 3:50 am
  • Reply Lisa - Mile by Mile

    So I have noticed over the last couple of months that your posts are always showing up on Bloglovin a day later for me, or sometimes that evening. Kind of weird but that’s why I always seem to comment so late! I don’t blame you at all for not always being able to reply to comments. You have a lot on your plate right now, and I find it amazing that you are even able to get these posts out. Great job talking yourself out of the panic attack!

    April 14, 2018 at 5:47 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      Well I appreciate you reading and responding no matter the time! But that is weird…

      April 14, 2018 at 6:11 am
  • Reply Cora

    I’m glad you enjoyed your birthday weekend and got BOTH your bday wishes. And yay for tummy rolling! (Talking about emmie here, though a good tummy role could be good for all of us).

    I’m sorry to hear about the bout of anxiety and panic you experienced. Those are always such hard feelings to push through. But sounds like you really used all your healthy coping strategies to rashion your way through it. Good for you. I do hope you feel proud and see this as proof of what you are capable of.

    I’ve always known you still read our comments and will get back to replying whenever you are able to. Don’t worry. I’m pretty sure it doesn’t change any of our enjoyment in reading and commenting 🙂

    April 14, 2018 at 10:11 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      I love you Cora! I hope we get to tummy roll together one day: )

      April 16, 2018 at 2:56 am
  • Reply Laura

    I’m just not catching up on blog replies too… and I don’t have a tiny human to keep alive. I think you’re killing it just by getting a post up!

    My shrink just gave me a book to read about dealing with anxiety. I’ll let you know if it’s good. It’s short, at least!

    Emmie remains absolutely adorable!!! I feel like all the moms I talk to have this phase. Like they baby went from SO easy to being a little terrorist. They seem to settle down though!

    April 15, 2018 at 6:00 pm
    • Reply suzlyfe

      Please let me know what you think about the book! I think I just need to get some new outlets as well–i can’t workout like I used to, so I don’t have that meditative yet energy expanding solution.

      April 16, 2018 at 2:55 am
  • Reply Kristy from Southern In Law

    Hmm, I don’t know if I have a habit that I’ve let slip. Maybe getting off all devices an hour before I sleep? But only because Jesse and my parents have been watching boring shows and I’ve distracted myself on the iPad, haha

    April 16, 2018 at 5:03 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      Hahaha well that is rude of them

      April 16, 2018 at 5:47 pm
  • Reply San

    I am hoping that Emmie will sleep like a champ in no time, because I can only imagine what it must feel like to operate on little sleep…. (and you’re worried about not replying to comments. Seriously, I don’t even know how you manage to keep us all updated! 😉

    April 16, 2018 at 5:20 pm
    • Reply suzlyfe

      I just appreciate you all so much!

      April 16, 2018 at 5:45 pm
  • Reply Kat

    I like the taste of coffee too much to get one of the fancy drinks. Not too mention the last one I tried literally gave me a tummy ache within 2 minutes. I either order black coffee or a plain latte, though sometimes I’ll be fancy and get an iced green tea lemonade. That’s as crazy as I get with that place! lol
    Sorry to hear that Emmie isn’t sleeping well – oh the peeks and valleys of being a mommy! Hopefully this will pass soon! <3

    April 16, 2018 at 8:19 pm
    • Reply suzlyfe

      Have you tried the almond milk latte? It might change your life. But I’m with you– gimme my black coffee!

      April 17, 2018 at 2:03 am
  • Reply Jen

    I always get so flustered trying to order something at Starbucks (because I hardly ever go), I need to do the mobile ordering from now on!
    I just brought my blog back after a year break, it’s a habit I’m wanting to bring back to my life consistently!

    April 17, 2018 at 6:26 pm
    • Reply suzlyfe

      Yay! I’m excited for you! and yes, online ordering is the way to go 😀

      April 18, 2018 at 3:18 pm
  • Reply Laura

    Happy 30th!! That is a big one! My older daughter was very much like your daughter- some babies have that temperament and everything (including sleep) is just more difficult. It was a very challenging first year for me but it did improve a little each month! Also- you definitely should not feel guilty about not replying to comments. Mom life is no joke! We all get it. I did so much less with my blog after having kids too… it’s hard!

    April 18, 2018 at 6:07 am
    • Reply suzlyfe

      Well, I’m glad to know that it does get better! She’s a good heart, just complex… right? lol! And congrats again!

      April 18, 2018 at 3:18 pm
  • Reply Neil

    Hey, we don’t expect you to answer the comments. You’re a mum now. You’re busy. Very, very busy. We just like reading about what’s happening at Susy towers with you, Alex and of course wee Emmie 😉 Take care my friend. Good to catch up on all your happenings!

    April 19, 2018 at 6:56 am
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