This is going to be an up and down post, y’all. One might even call it spiralized yukyuk (ps enter to win one here). But thank you in advance for hanging in there with me. But to keep the positivity flowing, I am going to make sure that I start and end with something fun and exciting.
1) You all know that I a) run b) love Team Challenge c) am from Georgia d) run with TC GA even though I have never trained with them and e) am really really ridiculously photogenic. Ok, that last one was a lie. But the rest are true. ANYWAY. LOOKY who is featured in this TC GA email!!!
FAMOUS I TELL YOU!
That picture was taken during my PR half marathon right here in Chicago the weekend that Alex and I moved here (also the only race Alex has ever seen part of, as mentioned previously, and my last race with TC). To continue with the running thing, I am still freaking “pending” for my Chicago Marathon Guaranteed Entry.
Oh, hell, let’s keep it going with the Chicago Running. I ran as the sun rose yesterday, which was very necessary (I’m having some mental roadblocks, which I will explain in a minute). I am actually rather pleased with myself–I thought for a bit about going a little bit farther than I was planning, but I turned myself around and showed my body that I have Ali G RESPEK for it. The right decision.
Last fitnessy-related positive thing and then we go to mental issues.
I am going back to Class Pass for a little while! I can’t wait for all the Flywheel and getting to take some yoga classes again 😀 And PILATES REFORMERS.
Ok, now for the deeper schtuff.
There are a bunch of things on my table right now. I feel like I need a Mental MealEnders, to be honest. I need to find a way to cap this persistent gnawing in my head–gnawing that isn’t doing anything productive, it is just a mindless cycle of munching. I just want to find a way to stop so that I can sit down to an organized meal that will actually fulfill me. But right now? I am at that blasted buffet. Eating here and there ad nauseum. And before I know it. I’ve eaten too much of everything–healthy, unhealthy, it doesn’t matter–and I feel sick and tired.
These feelings were stirred up by some thoughts that I had last week, some phone calls I’ve had with my mom and girlfriend recently, and then by Meredith’s post on being stuck–which, when she posted it, I was all like, I’m not stuck! And then I realized I was doing what I always do–digging a hole, knowing I’m doing it, and needing to be called out.
In short, there are a lot of moving pieces in my life. That isn’t to say that I’m so important and have so much going on. It means that right now? I need to clear my head space. I need to, as I said in my caption, get up and gain a new change of direction and find my place in the sun again.
I’m sorry for vague blogging…. but just know that I am OK! Just wading through my own mental marsh right now.
I do want to say thank you so much to everyone who reached out and gave me some great advice–sometimes, you just need to know that there are people out there, and to hear the same advice in a new way from different lips. Thank you, my dear friends. I am very much taking your advice to heart.
I was walking to work today and decided to go by Whole Foods because I was thinking about getting a coffee. While I was in there, I decided to pass on that and wait until I got to work. But as I was walking out, I passed the flower bouquets and thought to myself that it really would be so could if Alex might bring me flowers some time (I had told him that morning that I was having a tough time, but that we would talk about it at lunch). Well, sometimes? I remember why I married him. Looky what he showed up for our lunch date with.
The. very. bouquets. from Whole Foods. and #swoon
Last few thoughts: I continue to be so inspired by my lovely Whitney. She tackles those workouts like a defensive end. She struggles, she rallies. And she has it even more difficult because she has to do this without me there. That, my friends, is mental strength.
So my parting thought for today: sometimes, you just need the sun to rise in order to find the new direction in your life, to find the new perspective as light is shed in new ways. And when that happens? You will find that you had the mental strength all along.
I would bring all of you flowers on your hard days if I could.
Tell me something, anything–happy, funny, sad (I hope not), uplifting–on your mind right now.
Tell me a small (or large!) victory from the week and something that made you smile.