I have so many current moods going on right now you guys. Anyone else feeling this right now? Is it spring? Or am I just crazy?
You know those “Currently” posts? Well, right now, I’ve got all of these current moods. Like the time I did Current Status. I may or may not suss out some of these moods and feels in other posts, but for right now? Here is what is currently going on in my brain (brace yourself).
Need more serious thinking post? Check out What you CAN say to someone going through Infertility Treatments
I’m So Behind
You all have left so many incredible comments on this blog, and I feel terrible for not being up to date with my replies. I want you to know that I DO SEE THEM, even if I haven’t yet replied. I don’t know if I will get caught up today, but I am going to try to make a dent!
Guys, I don’t know what happened this weekend, but apparently those crack fries and beer Sunday afternoon made my appetite go BERSERK. Seriously. I always have 2 breakfasts (before and after my workout), and those usually tide me over until lunch. HA. BLOODY. HA.
Monday? My stomach was growling DURING my workout and I had to eat the last muffin AND one of Alex’s cookies 1.5 hours after second breakfast. Which was the normal, usually quite satiating, size and content. I then ate again 2 hours later, again at my normal snack time… and again 30 minutes later. Then, at dinner, I started off not hungry… and just kept going. SAME THING happened on Tuesday.
Wednesday was a bit more “normal” but not really.
Fullness Cues Can Suck It
Prior to my actively active hangriness, I was just eating like I saw fit–when you are making baked goods like bananas are going extinct and your flour is going to go bad (neither of which are true) and you have boundary issues and tendencies to eat impulsively… well, you just kind of give fullness the middle finger, say “f it, it’s all for Yoshi,” and telling control that you will see it later.
But when you are healthy cake like chocolate chip peanut butter cookies (recipe to come, maybe tomorrow), can you really feel “bad” about it?
I think not. I’m feeding Yoshi well. I think Alex had 3 of the aforementioned cookies…. and they are now gone. No one else had cookies other than us.
The Weather Can Also Suck It
Something that can REALLY suck it? THIS WEATHER. It has been bloody cold and bloody rainy for days now, and today (Thursday) it is supposedly going to rain, sleet, and snow.
I don’t need to say much more than that.
I Just Want to Run (Inside)
I am trying to stay nice and balanced with my exercising–don’t worry, I’m not exercising too much, and I have a feeling that some of the appetite increase is due to running rather than walking and elliptical-ing, and yes, I am refueling (see the first few moods). But the only amount of time that I have any inclination of spending outside right now? Is walking the dog. Who I’ve been taking to daycare because it is so.gross. I feel bad, but it really does suck outside.
Anyhoo, I’m spending my time inside with my book and music.
I Have a Husband?
Yeah, I’ve had a grand total of about 5 hours of solo Alex time since last Monday. We’ve had 2 dinners together just the two of us, and 2 dinners with other people in the interim. Other than mornings and just before bed, THAT’S IT. And I won’t see him this weekend because he is going on a bachelor party trip. See ya later, dear.
Scratching An Itch
And I’m not going to be seeing him much next week, because I have started a second job. This is the Thursday Thing. Which might have seemed a bit dramatic, but you have to realize the timing of the conversation. But y’all, even though IVF might be covered in Illinois, it is still expensive. And with tax season, a bunch of trips that we have to pay for (one of our friends who I LOVE DEARLY is apparently very expensive, or at least chooses places that are expensive to get to!), and medical expenses… well, let’s just say that we need to refill our coffers a bit.
So I am scratching an itch, and seeing if it is just an itch or the beginnings of eczema.
I used to LOVE serving–the interactions with customers, talking food and wine, the attention to detail, the pride that I took in service–and I think that I have found a good restaurant to help me a) make some money and b) see if this is something that I can do for a while. That said….
I AM SO CONFUSED
Along with applying to serving jobs, I also applied to a bunch of other jobs, from administrative assistant to social media for various companies (largely in health, fitness, and food). I didn’t hear from anyone. I did talk to a staffing firm, a meeting where I walked in (having landed the serving job), thinking that I would go through the motions and then just do the serving… and I walked out even more confused because they gave me hope.
On the one hand, I “traditional” job calls to me, on the other hand, what if I’m just not meant for a “traditional” job?
More thoughts to come.
MOMMY IS COMING
Even if I am as confused as all get out, everything is ok… because I get to see my mom this weekend. Other than a positive pregnancy test, she is just about the best birthday present I could ask for right now. The weather is supposed to warm up a bit (I’ll believe it when I see it), and I am basically going to let her and the puppy wear each other out while I eat ice cream (you know I will).
Alright, that is enough too-personal information for you dudes.
What is your current mood?